An Experience Of A Lifetime

I had a big start to my summer. My dad and brother came to visit me, and it was a great week of exploring Axum, Adwa, and Addis Ababa. I got to play tour guide through Axum and Adwa, although in Addis I was about as lost as them, never really visiting there and not speaking Amharic. It was a bit exhausting to always have to be on, but it was fun to show them “my home” and have them see and experience what my new reality has been for the past year. The best part was getting to hug them for the first time in a year, and it was a moment I will always remember. My brother was the last person I hugged before getting on the plane last summer and he was the first person from home I hugged in a year. It was a surreal experience.

My dad and brother got to meet some of my best friends in the Peace Corps [Jessie, Ally, and Kacey K] as they joined us at different points in their week vacation here. Jessie, Ally, Kacey K, and Natanya (sadly she didn’t get to join us) have been my rocks and best friends while over here. I never thought I would meet people who I would become so close to. As in many of my other blogs that I have written about friendships over here, you develop them partly out of necessity. I talk to a lot of people I never would have back home, but because they are the only people who understand my experience here, I have found friends in them. There are friendships that develop deeper than that, and these 4 girls are those friendships for me. Not getting to talk to 3 of them (Kacey K was in America the same time as me, so we got to text) for 20 days was really hard for me. I got back to Ethiopia and talked on the phone to Jessie and Natanya and they automatically made me feel better. I am so grateful for these girls and the friendships they have given me. And it was so awesome for my dad and Parker to meet them and see why I adore them so much.

One of my most favorite moments of my year here so far was in Axum with my dad, Parker, and Jessie. We were at the obelisks in the museum and there is a glass wall by the entrance. Jessie and I were walking through and heard kids yell “firenji!” very loudly. I was wondering how kids were able to get in and I was really annoyed that we were getting yelled at in a museum. I turned around and saw 2 little kids (a boy and girl) run towards me with open arms in front of a massive group of little ones. They were all wearing black robes and hats with bright green sashes. It looked like they were graduating—sure enough they were visiting Axum as part of their kindergarten graduation ceremony. I thought I recognized the 2 little ones with their arms spread open but I didn’t know how I would know them. They then said my name and asked me to twirl them. Jessie and I asked their teacher where these kids lived and he answered that they live in Adwa and are graduating from the kindergarten behind Nigste Saba (my school where I teach). What a small world! Turns out most of the kids from the kindergarten live in my neighborhood. It was great to run into kids who knew me in a town 30 minutes away from mine. My dad and brother found it highly entertaining and Jessie and I had a fun time playing with them for even a few minutes. I told them I would twirl them back in Adwa because I was not about to twirl like 40 kids in Axum. Sure enough, the next day when I was walking to meet my dad and brother for breakfast from my house one of the little boys who recognized me in Axum came up to me with his dad to be twirled.

When I told my dad and brother that I didn’t really know what I wanted to show them before they came, their reply was “We don’t need to be entertained, we just want to see your home and do what you do.” That’s a fairly easy thing to accomplish, because that really translates to sitting around and not doing much of anything. And that is what we did a lot of the time. We tended to do activities in the mornings when it was cooler, but because rainy season hadn’t started yet it still got hot in the afternoons, and we would generally take naps and relax then. It was a nice break for me, because I got to relax on Internet but I got to hang out with my brother, dad, and friends as well.

One of my favorite things that we did while in Adwa was a horseback riding tour around Mount Soloda to the lake by Adwa. Lauren (my old G8 sitemate) had made friends with a guy named Ace while she was here who owns a tourism agency in town. We fell a little out of touch after she left, but I was determined to find something fun for my dad and brother to do in Adwa. We ended up going on a horseback riding tour with Ace, and it was a blast. It was fun for them, because we rode out into the villages so they got to see how a lot of people in Ethiopia live and work (we passed a lot of fields that were being worked on). It was also fun for me, because although I have lived here for a year I don’t really venture out past my little bubble in town, so it was a treat to see my home from a new perspective. The horses were tame, listened well, and were easy to ride (the path was easy as well). So once I got past the initial fear of being on a horse for the first time in many years, I really enjoyed the journey. I had gotten to a part in my service where I was a little fed up with everything in my town, so it was a good break to get to see the landscape around my town in a new day and remember how beautiful of a place I live in. It was also nice, because I tell people back home that Adwa, Tigray reminds me a lot of Albuquerque, New Mexico and my dad and brother really got to see what I meant by that. We went to Ace’s horse stables after where there is a beautiful view of Adwa and the surrounding countryside and it gave me goosebumps to realize this is where I get to call home. It was a good way to end my time in Adwa before I left for 3 weeks.

Another cool thing we did in Adwa was visit market. There are always 2 flights a day from Axum to Addis, a morning and an evening flight. I specifically picked the evening flight on a Saturday, because I wanted my dad and brother to see market and where I buy my food every week. People ask me about the food constantly and I have mixed feelings about it. Although I do love the convenience and variety of American grocery stores, there is something cool about going to market, buying your food, and knowing exactly where it came from. I have the opportunity to see my students there and support their families, or my neighbors. I can buy tomatoes, honey, or scarves from 45 different people, each with a smile that welcomes me in. We stayed away from the food area, because we weren’t buying food. My dad wanted to buy souvenirs for people, which in Ethiopia consists generally of clothes. So we stayed in the clothes market block for the most part and walked around. Gebre, my counterpart helped us negotiate prices because I am too shy to bargain and not good enough with Tirgrinya to do that. I was excited because I got to buy jellies (plastic shoes that everyone wears here). I like the guys version better (the girls are more like flats), but I never have the chance to buy them. We bought pairs for my brother and stepbrother, so I went ahead and bought some too. We walked out of the market by way of the “donkey mart”. We asked Gebre which donkey he would buy if he could buy a donkey. He quickly pointed to one. When we asked him why, his answer wasn’t “because it is pretty” or “because it is strong” like we thought he would say. Instead he answered with “because he is a thinking donkey”—I guess he looked like he was contemplating life, so Gebre enjoyed that about the donkey and decided that was his favorite.

My dad and brother had a good time translating in their head how much they spent in birr into dollars. I stopped doing that, because PC pays us according to the living standard here, not America. So I don’t have the convenience of thinking everything is super cheap, however my dad and Parker enjoyed how much cheaper everything was and would occasionally ask me how much they spent on something. I of course thought for example that 150 birr dinner in Addis was ridiculous, but they would roll their eyes and pay it because in their minds, it was only $7.50 and that was a great price for a meal.

For anyone who has ever visited a big city, they know that the big city experience is almost never like the rest of the state or country. That is so true of Addis Ababa. We stayed in Bole, which is the more firenji part of the city and right by the airport, so in truth my dad and brother didn’t even really see much of Addis. However, at that point I think they were ready to be back in America, and experiencing some “Western Ethiopia” was a good thing. I thoroughly enjoyed being there, because this was the nicest thing I had experienced in a year. Our hotel was within walking distance of the restaurants PCV’s love to eat at while in Addis, so we had plenty of firenji food while there.

My favorite thing we did in Addis was actually go to a museum. I had been to the National Museum with the bones of Lucy in it before when I first got to country. They redid part of it since last year, so that was kind of cool to see. But, I was not as impressed with it as I had been the first time. The museum I was most interested in was the Red Terror Museum. I pass it all the time in Addis when I am there for PSN or PC things, but I have never had a chance to go in it, because it’s closed by the time we get out of sessions. It was a small museum, free admission, and fully funded by donations of people who come in to see it. I went with Kacey K, my dad, and brother and it took my breath away. I have visited the Holocaust Museum in Washington D.C. and it gave me the same type of reaction. I think the reason this one was almost more intense for me was because our “tour guide” had been a prisoner and experienced first hand what he was sharing with us. It also seemed more real because it was so recent, and I know many people who have first hand accounts of what happened during that time. I am not going to get into the politics or history of this time period in Ethiopian history, however if you want to look it up online—feel free to. In fact, I encourage you to. It’s something that we don’t hear about in history class, but is very important to the world and especially to where I live.

When you ask my dad and brother what their favorite thing they did, experienced, or saw in Ethiopia was they will probably tell you without missing a beat “the coffee ceremony” that my land family prepared for them. It was an ordinary coffee ceremony that would be prepared on holidays, nothing extravagant. But, for my dad who loves coffee and my brother who doesn’t, it was an experience that I continued to tell them about over FaceTime, so it was fun for them to actually experience what I think is also my favorite part of the culture. My land family decorated their living room with leaves, like on Fasika or Lidet, they showed the roasting of the beans, passed them around to be smelled, pounded them, and made buna in a jebena. They did the traditional 3 cups ceremony, and gave us fendesha (popcorn), as well as injira and shuro. I made a comment about how on holidays they also give me sewa and my land lady got very excited because she had sewa in her fridge, so they pulled out the bottle of sewa to have my dad and brother try. My brother took one sip and almost spit it up, so I finished his and mine. My dad finished his, although I think it was more out of politeness than actual enjoyment (it took me a couple of weddings and holidays to develop a taste for it). To my dad and brother, this buna ceremony was the bringing together of cultures, the ultimate sharing opportunity, and a great example of hospitality. They continue to talk about that being their favorite part of their trip, and my dad was so impressed with not only the ceremony itself, but my land family and how they care for me.

I knew I got lucky with my land family, but it wasn’t until I brought my dad and brother to visit and then left for 3 weeks and came back that I realized just how incredibly lucky I really am to have them. They prepared the buna ceremony for my family, they gave them fresh mangoes from the tree in our compound, and they hugged and kissed them when we left. When I got back from America I got the biggest hug ever from my land lady, and I almost started crying because I realized how much I missed her smile and laugh. She made me injira, shuro, and buna my first time back, and I found it appropriate that she made my last of those before I left Ethiopia and she made my first when I came back.

When people ask my dad and brother how they liked their trip they say, “We liked seeing the country, how Kelsey lives, and experiencing a new culture. But a week was just enough time.” I kind of laugh, because to me, a week is just a small portion of my experience here. We didn’t get to travel around the country as much as I would have wanted, but they got to see my home and that’s enough for me. By the end of the week, my dad was done with injira, my brother was ready to drink stuff besides coffee, and I was ready to spend some time by myself. But, I am very glad that they came to visit me.

As Peace Corps Volunteers we try to explain our lives to people back home. We take pictures to show them our homes and schools and food and people. We try to explain funny or sad stories that happen to us. We try to introduce our family and friends to our lives over here. But truthfully, it’s almost impossible to do so. Even with my friends in the Peace Corps in other countries, they understand more than others because they have had to do the same thing, but their lives are so different that the only people I can really have conversations about Ethiopia with are my PCV friends here. Having family members or friends come is a way to really help them see how your life is going. They get to see your home, how you interact with people, or how the politics of your country are.

They are still seeing a different world than you live in on your own. My dad and brother being with me had me being called firenji and money on the street more than if I was by myself. One of the kids in my neighborhood who loves me and always runs up to me ran away when my dad and brother were with me because they are tall, white males, and I got treated like a tourist by restaurants who normally know my order. On the other hand, I saw a bunch of my students, teachers, and neighbors on the streets and I had conversations with all of them, I spoke a full Tigrinya conversation with my land family, and I shopped at the clothes market, which I don’t normally do by myself. It was a great experience for them, as well as for me to show them how I live, while experiencing a bit of the way “an outsider” would experience it as well.